Changed Reality

Schools will be a challenge -

He is such a smart kid - on our last visit, he asked us whether he could go to private school. I asked him why he wanted to do that; he said he thought that they would be fun, with more things to do.

When we moved here, the dismal state of the local schools was a theoretical issue - an annoyance for sure as it was a drag on property values....

But now, given the requirement that children who are in the state's care must attend public school, it is a very frustrating thing.

While we know that, when the adoption is finalized, we can make choices outside the public school system; that is going to take a few months.


*sigh*

sham

maybe fatigue is settling in, but right now, feeling that much of the finesse claimed by the public social services system for the protection of children in need is a sham....

there is a basic level that is provided children - keeping them out of harm's way and sheltering them but that is in truth about all there is...

for the emotionally fragile or challenging child, medication is the solution offered and preferred....

late to heelys

you miss out on much when you don't have kids in your life - like heelys

so, in the window of limited hours that we had been given for our first official visit, we did some frantic looking to find some, as that is what he asked about....

we did not find them but got some knockoffs that hopefully will hold until we can get the real ones and get him home

reversal

this weekend, there will be a reversal of the travel pattern and for the first time, he will get to see his new home, his room and his neighborhood....

i probably won't sleep tonight...

reality

So, now with visit #2 behind us, we are settling into a more realistic assessment of what it will be like, day to day, once we have him with us.

I am not going to go into his life's history. This will be a challenge, one that we are going into with eyes wide open, with hope pinned on our shoulders.

I believe that we can and will make the positive difference in his life. We both believe that what he needs and has not had is someone constant who is there for him, talking to him and showing by action that we always will be there for him.

We are the third family that has appeared in his life, ready to become his "forever family."

My fear is that somehow we are not ready but my gut says it makes no difference as long as we watch our for him, love and support him as we build him up to the adult he will be.

avoiding the past

so, the second visit - this time, we are hoping to have a some genuine time away - just the three of us....

we have been reminded time and again, that we must proceed slowly, to gain his trust and comfort before we bring him to our home.... he has has unsucessful placements in the past and they want to avoid that....

this is very difficult for someone like me who likes to make a snap decision, after feeling it is the right thing to do....

all we really want is to have him here, helping him grow....

Terrific

Well, now that we got to spend some time with him; we got a sense of who he is - generally, I think he is a TERRIFIC kid, a bit sad, very quiet but really smart.

We are anxious and ready to put in place all the things he will need.

While the social workers keep asking us to focus on emotional bonding, assuring us that they will take care of finding the right educational and therapeutic supports he needs, I am concerned that they find the right ones, here in Prince George's.

So, we too begin our search as we delve into the complicated world of parenting and transitioning a child from an institution to a home.